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Simple Waltz (first time trying to write using sheet music!)

Discussion in 'Critique & Feedback' started by Mark Wayne, Mar 16, 2021.

  1. #1 Mark Wayne, Mar 16, 2021
    Hey everyone,

    I wrote this very simple waltz today because my objective was to create a short piece that I could use to help myself understand the interface for Noteflight (online music notation software).

    This is actually my first time attempting to write a piece using sheet music. Typically I have done everything by ear using the piano roll in my DAW, and sheet music is not required to make music that way. This time, however, I recorded a rough sketch of the idea using my MIDI keyboard, then slowly used Noteflight to transcribe what I was hearing. I then, afterward, exported the .MID file back into my DAW and gave it a different palette of sound - that is, my trademark retro synth sound that I use in many of my pieces.

    I'm including a link to an mp3 version which includes my synth arrangement plus the raw piano sound from the .MID, and I'm including the sheet music as well.

    I could use feedback on both, but especially on how the notation fits the piece. The chords on the left hand are meant to be staccato, but I'm wondering if there's a better way to inform the reader of the constant staccato than actually putting a dot over each chord. In a similar vein, the whole right hand is meant to be playing legato, essentially slurring all the notes. Putting slurs everywhere makes the piece look visually messy, so I'm thinking it would be better to just write "legato" somewhere instead? While I did learn how to read sheet music when I was much younger, there's a lot that I have forgotten and now am in the process of trying to re-acquire everything.



    Anyway, looking forward to hearing your thoughts!
     

    Attached Files:

  2. #2 Carlos Riesco, Mar 16, 2021
    Hi Mark, I think notation depends on how much liberty you want to give to the player. For example, you can put dots for staccato only in the first bar and then write "simile", giving the player the chance to make slight variations. It's also valid to write the chord name instead of the notes, unless you want those specific notes to be played.
    For the right hand I'm not sure a piano player needs the word 'legato', but I would put the slurs for the phrases, something like this for example:

    upload_2021-3-16_14-24-28.png
     
    Mark Wayne likes this.
  3. #3 Mark Wayne, Mar 16, 2021
    Thanks for checking out my piece, Carlos!

    I've gone ahead and made some modifications, adding slurs throughout the piece. It definitely sounds closer to the way I want it to when I listen to the MIDI version on Noteflight, but I'm curious if the notation makes sense to you as well.
    And the "simile" term is exactly what I was looking for! I even looked up how it was used, and the example they mentioned was about having staccato articulation be repeated throughout the piece.

    For now, though, I'm keeping the dots, since I don't yet know how to implement "simile" in Noteflight and have it be reflected in the MIDI playback.

    I also simplified the ending bar since what I initially had in mind just wasn't sounding right.

    I attached a new version of the score.
     

    Attached Files:

  4. #4 Carlos Riesco, Mar 18, 2021
    Hey Mark, sorry for the delay. I think it's looks better now.
    I don't think that the MIDI playback can do some 'simile' because that would involve playing some kind of random rythm... but I never used Noteflight so I'm just guessing.
     
    Mark Wayne likes this.
  5. #5 Paul Poole, May 8, 2021
    Simile means to continue playing in the same manner, in this case, to continue playing staccato. You'd put it above the bass staff in the third bar.
     
  6. #6 Cody Ortz, May 20, 2021
    I don't know of any notation program that can implement this yet. You could cheat a little bit in Dorico and adjust the MIDI lengths of the notes, but it won't read "sim." and adjust the notes. That's all manual stuff.

    As far as the piece goes, I think your harmonic functions would be stronger if you used B instead of G#min there at the beginning. You're kind of doing this I-V-I motion, rocking back and forth. That pull would be stronger with a B. The only reason I say that is because then when you throw out your Amin chords, there is a stronger sense of "home." Just a thought to consider.
     
  7. #7 Robert Jeter, Jun 12, 2021
    Hello Mark,

    I just joined the forum and it’s nice to hear your piece!

    The overall melodic structure works really well. I think you can make it more waltz-like with an “oom-pah-pah” accompaniment. I’ve attached a pdf and mp3 of a few harmonic/voicing suggestions.

    The biggest changes are:

    mm. 9-10: E major instead of A/E

    mm. 15-16: 1st inversion instead of root position

    mm. 21-22: E7/D instead of D major


    I really like this tune!


    https://www.dropbox.com/s/78kc059uv2iikfx/Mark Waltz.pdf?dl=0
    https://www.dropbox.com/s/5bzfnjqrf7s4ltd/Mark Waltz.mp3?dl=0
     
    Mark Wayne likes this.
  8. #8 Mark Wayne, Jul 20, 2021
    Robert,

    Thank you for your response and feedback, and welcome to the forum! I apologize that it's taken over a month for me to respond - I haven't been super active on this forum lately.
    The changes you suggested absolutely add a new flavor to the piece, and I appreciate you going ahead and including the sheet music notation as well.

    Cheers!
     
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