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Limbo - piano

Discussion in 'Critique & Feedback' started by Francesco Bortolussi, Jul 5, 2017.

  1. Are solo piano pieces allowed here? :D

    I've been putting the orchestral stuff on hold for a little while because of lack of time, but I've been practicing horizontal development through speed-writing exercises for solo piano. This piece has been conceived and finished in about 3 hours, and only uses (basically) one melody/idea. I sent an email to Mike with this piece attached on it yesterday, but I figured why not post it here also.



    Hope you enjoy it and have lots of useful feedback and criticism!
     
    Scott Steinmetz and Eric Watkins like this.
  2. I like it, but I'm afraid I have little to offer in the way of constructive criticism. I feel like my own writing is still a series of trial and error, improv, and pure luck. I do like that it never seems to resolve sooner than the end, at least not to my ears. This is something I could really use help with, but my harmonization skills are really primitive. I am promising myself I will address that in the coming year, as soon as the schedule clears a bit. Thanks for sharing.
     
  3. I like it. I actually dig it a lot. I do feel as a listener, that there are a couple WTF moments where you strayed from the main theme.

    You know where these are and I suspect you're working on them.

    Only complaints, dude. Other than that, awesome.
     
  4. Thanks a lot guys, that's very kind of you!

    Would you care to elaborate or give me the timestamps? Obviously since I've lived with the piece a lot longer than you, I can't really spot the passages that might sound jarring at first a listen myself.

    I found it funny that a couple of my musician friends told me that it was difficult to follow at a certain point, while my non-musician friends didn't find the piece challenging at all. Usually it's the other way around!
     
  5. At 1:08 before you go astray from the main melody It could have been a better idea use the main melody's some kind of changed form rather than the usual one.

    My composing right now is focused on piano solo rather than orchestral. So we're at close quarters. The first thing I think (or judge you could say) when I hear a solo piano pieces is 'Would I want this on my album?'. I'm strongly leaning over a yes on this one. My quick tidbits are it needs a little bit more depth and exploration melody wise and more dynamics to reflect (this is to my taste i/e makes it more dramatic) those territories. As this is not the best time for me to fully dwell on criticising this piece... I'll make back to this thread some later time!
     
  6. Right there at 1:08-1:10 or thereabouts, and again at 2:00 right after that descending run. Dude keep in mind I'm NOT a pianist, and I'm in no way discouraging your work...just as a listener, those parts were sort of jarring to me because everything that led up to it was really beautiful.

    I would say that those two parts (those bridges) feel sort of contrived...like you really didn't know how to move into the next part while using the melody that you came up with, so stuck those in there as a bridge.

    I really like the descending runs....like I said, I'm not a pianist, and those things are really hard for me. Seems like it comes easy to you, if you wrote this entire thing in 3 hours. It'd take me 3 months, for real.

    Honestly man, these are niggles....I really enjoyed the piece and those were the only two parts that I thought didn't fit...and I wouldn't even be able to come up with the parts I didn't think fit, so take that as you will. Just an opinion, not even an informed one lol.
     
  7. It's still very informative though, thank you! My goal is to make music for people, so the gut feeling of an audience toward a piece is at least 50% of what matters!
    This really means a lot to me! :) Yeah I was sort of shy/careful on this one, I didn't go all over the board with dynamics and drama (although maybe it didn't need it).

    Apparently the section at 1:08 isn't very popular, and maybe all it takes is to polish it a little bit, because if I had to do it again I would probably go the same route. I'll try not to get too paranoid on the issues of this piece though (while carefully taking notes of all the criticism), if I don't move on quickly to write other stuff I'll just sit on my ass :D
     
    Scott Steinmetz likes this.

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